Neptune's Net

there's this little place on pch, right at the bottom of the hill. they serve cold beer and fried shrimp. the final and ultimate line defining the separation between the real world and what takes place, each summer over looking the pacific ocean. during a hot day the stools along the bar and the few tables tucked into smoky corners would be filled with equal parts leather clad biker and sweaty jewish camp counselor. a strange yet perfect balance.

in the packed dining hall, pushing my way through trays of greasy grilled cheese and ranch dressing, i make my way over to the side table, swarming with bees and campers - lips stained red from bug juice - all hoovering over the peanut butter and tuna. as i busy my hands, spreading the peanut butter thinly on to the last piece of wheat bread, i catch his eye. "neptunes?," i mouth silently. with a simple and direct nod of his head, i know we've planned our escape.

as the rest of camp heads back to cabins to lay silently on their individual bunks, sweating, limbs sticking to warm and worn sleeping bags, we head down the hill bottoming out as we hit every speed bump with full force, honking as we swing around every corner, my hand hanging out the window, catching the wind, the air filled with static radio reception and true tales of summer drama.

if we leave the top of the hill at 1 we are sitting with an icy corona by 1:20, and waste not a second as we clink l'chaim and shove our limes deep into the narrow bottles with our dirty thumbs. turning my head to watch the cars that travel by, the surfers pour themselves into their wetsuits on the side of the highway, the outside world continue; i think, i've never felt so far away.

but time continues to tick and by the time he is up at the bar, getting our second round, i am looking at my watch, thinking, this can't last forever. i notice the news on the tv above the kitchen, and the two large men at the table next to us discussing the scores from the latest baseball game we didn't even know had been played. and as i pick at the dry, peeling skin on the ridge of my nose, on the tip of my chin, from my latest sunburn; and as i look down at my jean-shorts spotted with the brown paint we had used to paint over benches that had been painted over so many times before, i realize that this isn't where we belong. we pay our tab and as we get in his blue volvo he hands me a breath mint. we sing the camp cheer at the top of our lungs as we race up the hill, even more quickly than we had tried to escape.

Can I Interest You in a Sweater, or Two?

i'm craving sushi and a pedicure. i know know, i should really be used to the whole sore feet thing. but i'm just not and when i get moody, my feet hurt more. i had a frustrating conversation with one of the parental units today..it wasn't her fault but i don't want to take the blame either. you know when you get in an argument with someone about nothing and you know that the only reason you are arguing is because you are frustrated that the other person isn't understanding what you are trying to say? i hate that. i'd rather be in a real fight because then at least there would be some sort of point. but today was pointless and now, many hours later, i'm just annoyed with life (but barack is still my president!).

i went back to work today hoping to find that the retail world had rebounded with the news of hope and change, but alas...no one is shopping (which only makes me want to shop more...ugh). apparently one of my fellow monogram stylists is jumping ship. i don't know the details yet but they have hired someone new (which seems unnecessary since there are NO SHOPPERS). is it bad that i have already decided i don't like this new person (i have a history of being anti new people, which is an intersting place to be considering i'm new...hmmm). tomorrow i'm starting bright and early and going back to corporate to check out the second half of the spring line. i'll let you know...then we're off to la for some quality grandparent time...and a cooler full of titos enchiladas. good times!

Trying to Distract Myself

while watching the results (on mute...it's still early and ABN isn't home yet) i'm catching up on some reading. found this over at july bug and figured now that i have photos on my computer i'd give it a try...

4th album, 4th photo:













it's the summer of 2006 and a bunch of us met up in westport for a couples weekend at the beach. as always i'm the one mixing the drinks. three of the four couples are married now and one of the couples crashed and burned...hard. but you live and learn. and at the end of the day...i'll still be mixing drinks

Tell Me When its Safe to Look

it's possible that when casting my vote, early this morning, i cried. it was just an incredibly overwhelming feeling. i know, deep down inside that my feelings, beliefs and actions are counting. maybe not so much for the big kahuna job (after all, i live in blue blooded california) but for issues of uber importance.

so yeah i felt really empowered and then almost immediately utterly annoyed. we had waited in line for a little over an hour, me, sipping my coffee the entire time. ABN and i headed in at the same time and once i finished, it was time to pee. clearly. but where was ABN. i waited. and i waited. come on here, we were clear on all issues. it was simply a matter of connecting the dots...right? turns out...ABN is a SLOW voter. something you should discuss before marriage - no? after all, he knows all about my urgent need to pee.

i spent my day painting pottery in order to occupy my mind as much as possible. now i'm mixing OBAMA-RAMAS and trying not break out in hives. i'll keep you posted on how that goes.

Worrying all the Way to the Polls

i'm approaching the end of the two hours i have just spent in a cafe and so i figure, i should post before i extend my welcome (i'm still a bit unsure about how long it is appropriate to sit...but since it's mostly empty i figure it's okay for now). i have the day off and the car is in the shop and so i'm spending the day writing and thinking and walking around the marina. no complaints from me.

obviously the election is overwhelming everything else going on in my life (and probably yours) right now and while i have gone back and forth about whether to write about it or not, i find it increasingly difficult to write about anything else. i find myself counting down the days, hours, seconds until this is all over. anxious to turn on my tv, the radio, open in the mail and hear or read about something else. but i also wonder about what and who will fill the void. no matter what the outcome of the presidential election, and being a californian (!) possibly more importantly prop 8, i find myself nervously anticipating the next chapter. i come from a lineage of worriers and while i break out in a cold sweat, expecting bad news basically every time my phone rings (its a sickness, i know) i find myself now fearing the worst with our country as well.

even if the election goes the way we all HOPE...need...i worry about what will come next. i believe in the people i am voting for but i can't help but worry that it might not be enough. am i crazy? i'm worried i'm' not.

my dad always argues that worry is a wasted emotion (the worrying gene does not come from his side). but i think that in this case it might not be. after all, if the election goes the way we all HOPE...need...and we stop worrying about the state of the world, stop being active; if we go back to our passive ways, ways in which war is acceptable, energy is expendable and human rights are questionable...then maybe a little continued worry would have been worth it...no?

i vote for the right to worry.
and by voting tomorrow i can get a free coffee. done.

one more thing...because i am nothing if not a good sister. THE CHARACTER and his friends are doing interactive (totally biased) election coverage tomorrow night. it's on the web and it's fairly funny and very informed. and you can/should participate. there's even a drinking game involved. check it out here....you can learn more and see some of the coverage they did around debates to get a feel for what is to come tomorrow night.

BARACK the VOTE! and if nothing else vote no on 8 because really...REALLY!

Turn It, Turn It, Turn It Again!

today i had a drunk customer - which was an odd experience. as soon as i started to help him i knew, i could smell that he had been drinking. it was just after 1:30 in the afternoon and he was interested in the three piece suit. apparently he is friends with this new manager and he was trying to convince me to give it to him at the friends and family 30% off price...note - friends and family does not start for 2 1/2 weeks. i told him that was impossible, i told him he could open a card and save 15% today, i told him i could put on hold for a couple of days but not for the entire 2 1/2 weeks. he didn't seem to understand. he kept trying to bargain with me. eventually i just walked away because i wasn't really sure what else to do. oh and i sold a cashmere coat so that made me feel better. then this other weird guy asked me if i had ever spent any time in a south american ashram...um, no.

yesterday ABN and i headed to the apple store bright and early, before i had to be at work. after months of waiting, it was finally time to purchase my new computer - we've been doing a really good job of sharing ABN's old computer (and by good job i mean that we both grit our teeth while the other reads their "news") but it was time. i mean i haven't had a NEW computer since 1999 when i started school.

these gadgets have come quite a long way. don't be surprised if i start spending my mornings in the apple store taking free classes to learn all the ins and outs. i know, i'm a huge dork.

i've spent the last day (when not running around pineapple nation) uploading music. i have a lot of scratched cds which makes this process not the easiest but i'm determined to save what can be saved. a highlight was finding the recording made the last saturday night of college...not only did i put it on the computer but it has now been uploaded to my iphone. yep that was me that you saw walking through the tenderloin with a ridiculous grin on my face.

I Miss the Halloween Episodes of Rosanne!

i'm off to get my new computer - wahoo! months in the making! i'll see you on the flip slide. but until then:

every halloween from 3 to 14 i spent doing the exact same thing. dinner at her parent's or mine. in our costumes - hers often involving make up that she had to be careful not to smudge. both of our getups always homemade, nothing plastic. clowns, little red riding hood, pipi longstocking, 50s girls, hippies, lucy and ethel - all created by raiding our mother's (and grandmother's closets). better than anything anyone else was wearing. always.

by 14 we were living different lives and were no longer spending our tuesday nights together at hebrew school and so she did what she did and i dressed in plastic costumes from the costume store and met up with girls from the private girls school and rather than knocking on doors in my neighborhood, running up and down the hills to visit the same houses we would visit year after year, i headed to the valley. weird.

last night as i was waiting for the train to go home after work, surrounded by the joker and sarah palin and a lot of grown men in head to toe furry bunny costumes, i ran into her sister. on halloween. perfection.