last night BESTIE came over for dinner and help with jdate. in order to support my fragile mental state he let me take control and email whoever i wanted (as long as they were "cute") whatever i wanted. its been a few days since i smiled so big. there were definitely a lot of ladies who i skipped over, a few who i audibly UGHed, and one who's profile reminded me so much of BESTIE'S ex (she described herself as extremely confident, driven and a true catch) that i had to quickly minimize the window for fear that she might be able to see me! still, there were more than a few that stood out in a good way and a couple that i might have fallen in love with...just a little bit (one girl who offered to make me, i mean BESTIE, a lamb chop!) i had to stop myself twice from ending the emails - love, LBN. i'll keep you updated with how i do.
i've been in quite the STATE the last few days - and i feel pretty bad about it, which only increases the STATE i'm in. it's not that i'm not excited about SF...i can't wait for the two of us to start a new life, to have an adventure, to live on the west coast. i'm just totally and completely overwhelmed by the idea that all of this is happening so quickly, that i am leaving my job/apartment, that i have to say goodbye (OH GOD). ABN is taking care of all the plans and doing things like cooking dinner and as amazing (i hate that word) as he is being...i'm pouty and naggy and bitchy to boot. i can't shake it...hence, the STATE. my neck hurts, i have no appetite, i'm not really sleeping, i'm working like a million hours because soon i will be working no hours, i'm not going to the gym, my knee hurts, right now its cold and rainy, tomorrow it will be hot and sweaty...i could go on...
if i keep this up though, no one is going to miss me much, and ABN is going to tie me to the roof rather than let me drive across the country with him.
we're headed to westport tonight and nyc tomorrow night to see friends and family. i'm focusing on packing for these few days rather than packing for anything else.
i had an mri last month and finally, after calling four times, the dr (read: asshole) called me back. he did say something about a plica but i was so pissed at him i basically tuned him out. he offered me nothing except that he did suggest i should find another doctor once i land in SF. thanks.
last night when BESTIE came over he brought with him a bag of mystery dorritos. i was convinced that they were margarita flavor. i was wrong. but i did eat about half a bag.
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